UPDATE

So how about an update on my life eh? Well I got the promotion at my work to HEAD CASHIER its a managerial position.

I am still single. I am content with where I am. I have a continous smile that is due to the spirit that has been released due to a new aspect of my life +p. [That is all I will be saying]

I am goin into my 3rd regular semester 5th [includes summer] overall semester of college.

I am still in my parents home but I am currently working on that.

I have never stopped writing, rapping, singing, dancing,

AND I AM STILL BLESSED +P

Poems on the internet

So I did have my poem I wrote today on here but I thought about it, I dont want anyone else trying to steal my work. But then again I want my work to be read by those out there who also enjoy poetry. So does anyone have any tips on how to satisfy both situations?

DEATH

TODAY I WAS IN MY PSY 132 CLASS AND WE WERE TALKING ABOUT THE CELBRATIONS OF DEATH AKA FUNERALS AND HOW THEY DIFFER FROM CULTURE TO CULTURE. MY PROFESSOR SHARED HER STORY WITH US ABOUT HOW SHE HAD TO MAKE THE DECISON TO PUT HER FATHER TO SLEEP. WELL I WAS LOW KEY TEARIN UP INSIDE.

HERE IS THE THING RIGHT NOW I AM SITTING IN MY ROOM GETTING READY TO DO HOMEWORK AND I JUST CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT THOSE WHO HAVE PASSED BECAUSE, WELL TO BE HONEST IDK WHY.

I MISS MY ANGELES SO MUCH. I KNOW THEY ARE IN A BETTER PLACE BUT IT HURTS ME TO KNOW THAT I WILL NOT SEE THEM PHYSICALLY FOR A LONG WHILE.

AS I SIT HERE AND THINK, I BEGIN TO TEAR, I TRY TO THINK ABOUT THE GOOD MEMORIES BUT THAT JUST MAKES IT WORSE. I DON WANT TO JUST HAVE MEMORIES I WANT THEM HERE. BUT THAT IS A VERY SELFISH WAY TO THINK. GOD HAS A BIGGER AND BETTER PLAN FOR MY LOVES.

--BUTTERFLY!

2010 POST

SO I HAVE YET TILL NOW TO POST ANYTHING ABOUT 2010. WELLL HERE WE GO. SO FAR IN 2010 I HAVE BEEN WORKIN NOW SI NCE NOVEMBER 2009. I AM AN AVON SALES REP. ALSO I AM IN THE STUDIO A TON MORE. I NO LONGER RUN TRACK BUT I AM PICKING DANCE BACK. I WILL BE GETTING TATTD NXT CHECK AAND POSSIBLY MOVING OUT NO LATER THAN AUGUST.

I AM STILL SINGLE AND HAVE YET TO STUMBLE ACROSS SOMEONE WORTH WHILE. SOOOO YEA THATS A QUICK UPDATE FOR YA +P

BUSINESS WOMAN

[this pic was chosin because it shows true happiness and thats what this post is about]

WELL AN UPDATE ON MY LIFE. IT IS KIND OF EXCITING TO ME.

I AM NOW, WELL FOR THE PAST MONTH OR SO, A WORKING WOMAN. NOT ONE BUT TWO JOBS.

ONE IS AVON- I AM AN INDEPENDENT SALES REP. ITS MY BUSINESS. I HAVE A BUSINESS ACCOUNT AND EVERYTHING. HERES MY WEBSITE , CHECK IT OUT. http://desireejohnson.avonrepresentative.com/

TWO IS FOREVER21. I AM A TREND ADVISOR/SALES ASSOCIATE/CASHIER. BOMB I LOVE IT.

ALL ON TOP OF THIS, I ATTEND COLLEGE, FINSISHING UP MY 1ST SEMESTER GEARING UP FOR 2ND. I RUN TRACK AND TAKE CARE OF MY SON/PUPPY DREAM && THE REST OF MY FAM.

I AM STILL SINGLE. NO ONE HAS BEEN ABLE TO HANDLE MY BUSY SCHED, THEY WANNA BE WHAT I CENTER MY LIFE ON, AND WELP WITH ME, THAT HAS NEVER && PROB WILL NEVER HAPPEN. BUT WHO KNOWS MAYBE WHEN IM 50 OR SOMETHIN. EVEN THEN IM GONNA BE BUSY LOL..

SO BASICALLY IM LOVEIN LIFE SUPER MUCH!!!

EMOTIONS-[POETIC FREESTYLE]

Emotions for you continue to build. They disperse amongst my heart, my mind, my body, my soul.
Emotions that I have no ability to control.
At one momment I hate the way you speak.
Another passes by and I love the way you express what resides inside so sweetly.
There is something about you that continues to reel me in.
But don't get it wrong I know about your character and how your love is a trend.
You contain the knowlege that many desire your love, your touch, you heart your sexual clutch.
But I consume, take in, obsereve this mannerism as if it were my pray.
A lioness is what I am and emotions, strength and wisdom is where my inteligence lays.
Attacking what I see as weak.
Tearing thru it all, ripping, biting and nawing throught its meat.
Emotions that build inside of me,
I will no longer hold them in, nor will I set them free.
Emotions that lay within, you are ignored, put aside and dismissed.

SINGLE VS COMMITMENT

Bein single has its perks but it is nice to have someone solid in ur life ya kno? I desire somethin solid. Somethin natural & not forced +p

Therfore while I do me I will not allo false love, bs, games distract me. Nor am I saying that if tru love comes it will distract me. But I will open my time & heart to them. But I will continue to do me

ponder on this

why is that... when someone passes away, ppl refuse to say "died, death" . harsh words perhaps? no one wants to face the reality that once you lose someone their physical presence is no longer there. spirits may watch over you, but it is not the same. i am one of those who try to think optimistic, but that does me no good, because i will have my breakdowns and its no good.

i just wish i could rewind time or go and visit them in a dream or something. life without my aunt and big mamma just isnt the same. i am done writing now because this is too hard, goodnight

im turnin it in early tonight

god bless

+butterfly-d

[in low caps due to my mood while bloging this]

CHICAGO TEEN BEATEN TO DEATH

http://www.chicagobreakingnews.com/2009/09/candlelight-vigil-scheduled-for-teen-beaten-to-death.html

This right here is redic. This poor boy was beaten to death for now reason. Read and watch. This makes me want to cry. Man... This is why other ppl outside the black community look at us as heathens and idiotic and animalistic ppl.

MY PRAYERS GO OUT TO THE FAMILY. LORD PLEASE STAY BY THEIR SIDE!

BIBLE THUMPERS

Life is amazing.... I am young and I have fun... but I do live semi responsibly... not even semi... I do live responsibly. Mistakes are supposed to happen, so you have the ability to learn from them. I am living not dying so why live in fear? You only live once so do what you want. God will forgive you. No matter the sin, well only if you deny the Holy Ghost, then he probably will not.

If you do not know what I mean by what I just said up above in the last couple sentences, I shall explain. The lord is a forgiving man, no matter the sin you commit you have the ability to be forgiven as long as you truthfully repent; but there is one exception to his forgiveness, which is that of the “denial of the Holy Ghost”. This means, say something amazing has happened to you, like a miracle, and the only way that it could have possibly happened was through the Lord, and you say “Oh no He has nothing to with my success, I do not need him.”; This is the sin that He will not be able to forgive.

No I am not pulling this out of my rear end. I had a very insightful conversation with my PaPaw (grandfather), and I asked him “If a person has committed a wide variety of sins in their life, will they be forgiven?” He told me what I just mentioned above. So those of you who are Bible thumpers that believe that you are perfect and you do not make mistakes and that if one does not obey by the Bible all the time and go to church every Sunday the Lord will not accept you in his house, well I am sorry to tell you but you are definitely wrong.

You are able to believe and interpret the Bible in anyway, and I respect your beliefs. My only problem is when those people who are such “Christians” tend to expel so much hatred and prejudice to those who do not follow the Bible exactly, but do still believe in the Lord, and those who just have a different faith or none at all.
This was just my thought for today. What do you think?

COLLEGE LIFE!

Even tho its just GCC its about to be great!

Track season is about to be amazing!

School I plan to geek it up...

Ill be at most of the GCC football games supporting my team.... I may try to work the game lol extra cash lol

Things in my life have always been a roller coaster but I have learned to control my stomach and just enjoy the ride even with its ups and downs.

When one door closes another may open even if its not right away, one will open.

I am becoming a better woman by the day. my process is slow but it I am progressing. Each day I learn something new about either myself, someone else, a subject, or just life in general..

Life is a learning experience and I am gaining my knowledge!

LORD PLESE STAY BY MY SIDE!

I do not understand some of these lil girls man. They call them seleves grown? Yet they sit here and act like a child. Idiotic decisions and rediculous behavior. Sexual and revieling ppictures on a website where family can see... Idk. Well people will live their lives how they want, all I can do is give advice to them, hope they take it in and pray for their well being. My outlook on life is completely different...

I can no longer sit and be mean, crude, and selfish any longer. I am working on my attitude at home with my parents. I have noticed they have done sooo much and deserve way more appreciation, esp. my Daddy.

I have never been nor will I be a vulgar, and disrespectful person. There are aspects of my personality that need no change, but there are some that need a tune up and a complete new engine!

My life revolves around, God, family, my future, school, track, dance, friends[close&true], and possibly love.

Life is like a big roller coaster, a catapillers journey/life, before, during and after the cacoon and change into this beautiful butterfly! I am blessed and I tell myself this everyday, and so should you!

FAMILY FIRST!

I HAVE BEEN GOIN THRU SOME
FAMILY ISSUES, AND NOW I EITHER HAVE TO DELETE A PART OF ME OR JUST HIDE IT ONCE AGAIN. AND WELL I HAVE DECIDED TO KEEP THAT PART OF MY LIFE AWAY FROM MY FAMILY AND AT THIS TIME AWAY FROM ME TOO.

I HAVE FIGURED OUT WHY GET SERIOUS WITH SOMEONE WHO'S LIFESTYLE IS NOT ACCEPTED IN YOUR FAMILY....

SO THAT PART OF MY LIFE WELL RELATIONSHIP WISE IS TERMINATED. THERE WILL STILL BE THE HOOK UPS HERE AND THERE BUT AS OF NOW IT IS NOT WHAT IS BEST FOR ME NOR MY FAMILY!

MY FAMILY IS MY STRENGTH AND WELL THEY WILL ALWAYS BE WITH ME. SO ANYONE WHO TRIES TO TEST MY LOYALTY TO MY FAMILY DOES NOT DESERVE ME AND IS NOT RIGHT FOR ME!

I CUT OFF ALL MY LOOSE ENDS AND I AM STRENGTHENING MY ROPE! I WAS TESTED AND I DID F UP.

&& NOW I AM BEING GIVEN A SECOND CHANCE, BY SOMEONE WHO HAS DONE NOTHING BUT BE PATIENT WITH ME. AND I APPRECIATE IT. I WILL NOT SPEAK ON THE SITU TOO SOON BECAUSE I DO NOT WANT TO JINX IT! +P

UPDATE OF MY LIFE

LATELY I HAVE BEEN IN THE RECORDIN STUDIO A TON. DOIN MY MUSIC THING SO LOOK OUT FOR ME AND MAH FAM, WE COMMIN OUT HARD.

I HAVE ALSO BEEN IN THE DANCE STUDIO. AS WELL AS DOIN SOME PERFORMANCES HERE AND THERE, AT STODIMIRES AND AT A PHX 1ST ASSEMBLY[CHURCH].

SCHOOL STARTS ON 8/22/09 FOR ME, YES A SAT. I AM EXCITED. TRACK BEGINS IN SEPTEMBER!

I HAVE YET TO GET MY KEXUS FIXED BUT I BELIEVE NEXT WEEK MAY BE THE WEEK!

WELL THATS AN UPDATE ON MY LIFE YALL. THANKS FOR READIN.

TAKE ME OR LEAVE ME

It seems that everytime I become close to someone I push them away. I get in over my head thinking about what could be. This only happens when i get extremely close to someone, like sayin I love you but not sayin I am in love ya know?

So instead of trying and being successfull and pushing someone who cares about me away; I have decided to just let things run their natural course. I also know at times to take the initiative and let my feelings be known.

I have so much too offer but I am also a very complex woman. I come with a wall around my heart, stubbourness, attitude. control and trust issues. Even though I come with these cons my pros out wiegh them. I am funny, loving, caring, loyal,I cook and clean, I am great with kids, I believe in God, I am open minded to life and will try mostly anything[not drugs] I am goal//family//musically oriented, I am a great dancer, I am intellectual, inteligent, street smart, I contain and amazing, desireable, and irresistable sex appeal, I do not count on sex to make a relationship. The list could go on forever.

But all in all I am a good woman, a great woman, but I am not perfect. "Take me for what I am. For who I was meant to be. And if you give a damn, take me baby or leave me"-RENT

EGYPT--A PLACE I CALL HOME

THIS ABOVE AND BELOW, WELL THIS IS THE VIEW FROM MY NEW CASA IN WADDELL,AZ AKA EGYPT!!!!!!! BEAUTIFUL

UNDER THE RADAR

i will def be goin under the radar till mah birthday, than after mah birthday celebrations..

SUPER UNDER THE RADAR

i do not understand how ppl kan/want to party every weekend. personally i like kick backs/chill outs with my ppls... nothin too serious. i like to do the whole movie thinf, bowlin, skating, ice skating, lazer tag, water parks, etc...
as far as partyin/clubbin. im puttin myself at a great risk everytime i go do somethin of that sort.

i know how some ppl say oh ur bout to 18 ur gonna club ur ace off.... well that maybe true but only for the first 2 weekends of my new age....

i have never been a big partier, i am more a chill person. parties are fun every once and a while...

i will be focusing on school, track, dance, singing, and mah freestylez... because im about to be 18 almost close to full grown...gitta hit 21 ti be full grown.

SOO THIS A NOTE TO EVERYONE WHO SAYS "WHY DON I EVER SEE U OUT"
I DON DO OVER CROWDED PLACES, HENCE WHY I DON GO OUT... AND ALL THAT IS LISTED ABOVE.... LOL

Thanks for reading

DesiEliz//Ree' aka Butterfly-D

CRACK OF THE HOUR SHPEEL: VOL I

You know how some people have a fear of life and others have a fear of death.. well i have neither. My fear is not being allowed to live how I want to. Hence why I am so secluded, why you don't see me in relationships very often; almost never. I mean i have been single for a year and my longest relationship was only 6 months. I have come to realize that I can no longer live so guarded.

Yes I can protect myself a bit, but if I never fall how will I learn how to get back up. This all is very cliche' I must admit, but it is all the truth. I am going to be 18 in less than a few weeks now, and I am going to be a frosh all over again, but this time where it counts, College.

Do not get me wrong I will still live as the lil tough cookie I am, but I will be more open, not naive, but open to what others have to offer, instead of just shutting them down. This change will not happen overnight, because lets admit it, if you know me well, I can be a BITCH, well a real, independent chick when it comes to relationships. I can be insensitive and just cold hearted.

I do not want a serious relationship, so do not come saying I LOVE YOU etc... just, I would like to me new people, experience my frosh yr, with out going WILD....

Welp thanx for lisrening//reading lol

DesiElizz//Ree'J

aka BUTTERFLY-D

DAILY LIFE: VOL VIII

Well I am pretty sure ya'll read the post below! Yes Desi Eliz, Ree'Ree', or whatever you call me, YES I am finally growin up! I am about to be 18 in about a month! I do not have a job, but if you know my family, well lets say my parents rather have me foocus on accademics and athletics!

I do want a job tho. Uhm I wourkin on more tattoos, but I need to get my money in order first! But by christmas I shall be way tattd! New piercings comming soon. Navel[reg top] Navel[dermals bottom and possible both sides]. I have watched vids of them so idk it looks painfull.

I WILL ^^"DO THE IMPOSSIBLE!"^^

MY FUTURE!

WELL I SIGNED THE PAPERS TODAY!

I WILL BE ATTENDING GLENDALE COMMUNITY COLLEGE!

I AM ON A TRACK SCHOLARSHIPS--GOING IN AS ONE OF THE TOP TRIPLE JUMPERS!

I WILL BE LIVING WITH MY BROTHER AND HIS GIRLFRIEND && AT MY PARENTS NEW LUXURY HOME IN WADDELL WHEN I WANT TO GET AWAY...

BUT I AM EXCITED TO TAKE THIS NEW JOURNEY! AND TRACK SEASON AND MY KINESIOLOGY MAJOR SHALL PUSH ME AND MOTIVATE ME!

HEY GUYS DESI IS GROWING UP!